All mama’s deserve to know how important they are on Mother’s Day! What I struggle with most is knowing when the right time to get mushy-gushy is. Most people don’t want to break their everyday grind to say something from the heart, including me. But the older I get the more I feel my mom deserves to KNOW that I understand her so much better now. And that I’m so thankful for her place in my life.

From the day I was born until I left home I needed my mother for every aspect of life. As a kid I needed her to run to when I had a bad dream, rub my back when I was sick, and teach me how to tie my shoes. I needed her advice when I crossed into the world of middle school – where friendships became more complicated and mascara was uncharted territory. In high school, I needed all the one-on-one shopping dates, complete with Starbucks and a nice long talk. I needed her to love me no matter how ignorant my attitude was, and all I really wanted after a sucky day at school was to come home and find her in the kitchen making dinner, waiting for me.

None of this ceased when I went to college. I may have left home, but my youth was not over. I still didn’t know so many practical things and had no idea how to survive on my own yet. I still called her every time I got sick to see if she knew how to help. I still leaned on her to answer questions like, “How long does it take for pasta to cook?” and, “At what point is the meat that’s been sitting in my fridge all week considered ‘bad’?” (…yikes!). It wasn’t until halfway through my Senior year that I really starting growing up. I became more independent: financially and emotionally. I had abandoned the careless days that preceded and was trying really hard to figure out my own problems and prove to myself that I was ready for the real world, ready to be on my own.

The more things changed, the more I began to recognize a new stage in my relationship with my mother. She wasn’t just my mom: the queen of my life, the one who holds all the answers. She was all of that, plus an incredibly unique and talented individual whom I could also call my friend.

Last week AJ and I went shopping for something to send our mama’s. As we were walking around the Faneuil Hall Marketplace in North End, I couldn’t help but think of how my understanding of my mother has grown considerably in the past few years. The gratitude I feel for her now is so much broader and more profound than it was during my school days. My mother is so much more than I ever knew… and I get her now. 

For one: she’s incredibly smart. As a kid I knew that she went to college multiple times. But as an adult who’s been through a four year degree myself (plus a little more, cuz who doesn’t love a victory lap?), I’m blown away by her education. She went to college FOUR times, for fun?! She’s been through Beauty School, taught Elementary School, earned a Music Education degree that she used to pass her beautiful piano skills along to eager kids, and is now working her butt off as a Dental Assistant.

Two: she’s talented beyond measure. She taught me how to paint my first self-portrait, sew my own curtains for my bedroom in middle school (purple with hot pink *furry* cheetah trim in case you were wondering), DIY old furniture for my first big girl apartment, and bake a BOMB New York style cheesecake from scratch.

Three: she’s undeniably independent and grounded in herself. Don’t let her sweet and quiet spirit fool you, she’s a bad ass and she’s true to herself. She does things her way and could not care less what other people think of her. She’s never going to disrespect you, but she’s also not going to back down if she believes in something. She taught me how to stand on my own two feet, be brave in this world, and to show others respect but not take their crap. She made sure of my own independence from a very young age. I remember her sending me into Winn-Dixie when I was 6 or 7 years old, a story she loves to tell, and watching me go grab some milk through the window and pay for it all by myself. I remember her teaching me how to make peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches for my younger siblings when I was just a kid, and letting me “babysit” them while she went upstairs to take a nap.

It’s crazy to think how long she thought and prayed about her role as my mother, her first born… long before I was conceived, I’m sure. Yet, I’m just now seeing it for what it truly is. She’s been here for me my whole life, loved me through every stage. She’s found joy in my moments of success and been hurt in times where I acted out against her. It wasn’t until I got married and thought about my future as a mother that I really considered what it might mean to be a parent, and saw more clearly what my mother has accomplished (and *endured*) in her life.

It dawned on me, walking around that day, what little use there is in these revelations of gratitude if I’m not going to share them with her. There are so many things we go about life wishing we’d said. I don’t want this to be one of them. So I’m writing this to make sure my mama knows exactly how much I appreciate who she is, and how my eyes have been opened up to the wonder that I know as my mother, Kimberlee.

Mama, 

I’m always going to need you and I’m always going to want you! You gave me the world, and I am so thankful for the parts of your personality that I inherited. You’re my superhero. You’re kind, interesting, funny, adventurous, beautiful, and so much more. I admire everything about you and I am so PROUD to be your daughter. I hope I’m everything you are one day. I’m sure I will be, because I’ll have you to make sure of it. 😉

Sending you a hug from Boston. I love you.

Thank the mother’s in your life today because life is way too short not to say what you feel. Happy Mother’s Day to all – we wouldn’t be here without you!

Here’s a little collage of Kim for you, because she just gets better and better with age: